严雅译评/严观的新诗《照夜白》

严观

诗写者善与万物对话，解构万物，重构精神宇宙。“照夜白”的画像出自1400多年的唐代，《照夜白》的诗歌却超越了诗歌总想刻意保持的时代性，在漫长而宽广的时空中重现马与武士独立而高迈的灵魂，以文字书写画中画的异质之美。
Poets are good at communicating with temporal, deconstructing them to reconstruct a spiritual universe. The portrait of "Night-Shinning White" is born in the Tang Dynasty from more than 1400 years ago. However, the poem transcends the time when poetry always try to reflect typical characteristics of the times. It represents the independent and lofty soul of the horse and the warrior in the long and broad river of time, and composes with words the heterogeneous beauty of painting.
“金色贯通”为底色，为意境作铺设，接着“一声嘶鸣”撼动了一帧画的安静，这匹马奔跑起来。武士的配剑，闪着雪晶的光芒。“六芒星无限坍缩/镶饰云图的迢遥远景。”武士佩剑雪晶的光芒使六芒星晦暗，迢遥的远景展现神秘的想象。这样的光景中武士感受宝马“肌体的微温”，画也就有了生命。
"Golden glow" is the background color, laying for the artistic conception; then "a whinny" awakes the silent picture and the horse starts galloping. The sword of the warrior is shining like a piece of snow crystal. "The Star of Davidminifies unceasingly, Until an inlaid of a stretching cloud atlas." The warrior's snow-crystal-like sword cast the Star of David six into shade, while the distant vision leads us intomysterious imagination. Among all this, the warrior feels the "the touch of warmth" from the horse, animating the whole painting.
万物不可明辨，而伊人在水一方。武士与不可得的爱，使诗与画多了某种故事性，也使得一切蒙上了一丝淡淡的忧郁。暮色和光影，如此柔软。
“Everything on earth is indistinguishable”"The one I yearn for, is on the other shore" Warrior and his unreachable loveradd to the painting a story and a touch of melancholy amid the soft twilight and shadow.
《照夜白》在冷峻的叙述中呈现辽阔的想象力和深邃的精神世界，浓烈的个人情感聪颖而真诚，意向跳跃而集中，逻辑自洽到酣畅淋漓。
In the calm narration, Night-Shinning White presents broad imagination and a profound spiritual world. Besides, the poem delivers strong personal emotion of the poet, intelligent and sincere at the same time, whose mindset is inclusive but also concentrate. Besides, its logic proves itself excellently.
铺设、陈述、宕转、和鸣四段式中完成，仿佛置身一个广大的空间，从某处悬铃木（梧桐树）的景观大路缓步而行，夕阳的金色与白色的马相映成趣，马的飞驰而与遥远的事物发生关联，星宿海或任何个人神游物外的想象以诗意存在于其中。暮色四合时，蓦然看见白光飞速掠过。此刻，达至力量、审美与意志的臻境。（诗歌解读：严雅译。英译：米娅）
Above-mentioned contents are integrated via four stages, ie., underlaying, narration, ebb and flow and harmonic concord. As if placing itself in a vast space, the poet walking from somewhere of a road lined by sycamore trees,the golden sunset and white horse form a delightful contrast. Galloping horse and distant circumstance interact with each other, Singsuk Sea or any imagination goes beyond earthly existence formulates a poetic existance.
When the twilight falls down, a beam of white light quickly flies by, reaching the realm of strength, aesthetics and willat the same time.(By: Yan Yayi)

附中国著名诗人严观的原作：《照夜白》


照夜白


悬铃木拥立的路，
让金色贯通。
一声嘶鸣，
照夜白双前蹄腾空。

星宿海的积雨云，
电闪雷鸣。
武士的佩剑，
出鞘一刻形如雪晶。

六芒星无限坍缩，
镶饰云图的迢遥远景。
鞍辔与真菉，
着意肌体的微温。

万物不可明辨，
不可久立于蒹葭苍苍。
“所谓伊人在水一方”，
暮色四合，光影掠壤。


英译：米娅

Night-Shinning White


The road lined by sycamore trees,
Beamed through by golden glow.
With a whinny
Night-Shinning White’s forehooves kick in the air.

Beneath cumulonimbus clouds above Sungsuk sea,
Lightning and thundering.
The sword of a warrior,
Like snow crystal, it exsheaths.

The Star of David minifies unceasingly,
Until an inlaid of a stretching cloud atlas.
Saddle bridle and hispid arthraxon in green,
Delivering the touch of warmth from the horse.

Everything on earth is indistinguishable
But do not stand by the reeds for too long since
"The one I yearn for, is on the other shore"
Twilight befalls, intervening light and shadow sweep the soil.

goofegg

goofegg

goofegg 发表于 2024-8-26 21:52

可是这幅画？和六芒星有关系么？没看到啊

严观

goofegg 发表于 2024-8-26 21:52
可是这幅画？和六芒星有关系么？没看到啊

这就是那匹马——照夜白